Why I Love Living Here
(In no particular order)
(In no particular order)
- My backyard. Have I shared with you what a great backyard I have? I always feel so lucky sitting out there with my friends, as we watch our kids playing freely. My backyard is amazing.
- My house. This is the house Joe and I bought together, This is where we made our babies. This is where Joe last lived, and where his clothes and spirit still live.
- My job. I have a great job, at a great school. I don't see myself teaching anywhere else. But I don't see myself doing anything else either.
- My daycare. I have the very best daycare situation in the world. It's irreplaceable.
- My friends. Do I need to go into detail about my friends? I think not. All of you regular readers know that I am incredibly lucky to have found some of the most wonderful girlfriends anywhere. How could I leave them?
- Widow group. I can't imagine Monday nights without them. (Or any other night for that matter.) They get me through times that no one else can.
- My therapist (hi Lisa!) She's the best.
- My mom. Ok, so she charges me $85 to watch my kids for the day. But she really is good with them. And they adore her beyond words. So that, in itself is worth $85. (I think)
- My brother and his wife. They are unbelievable with my kids. They are very generous with me as well.
- The cemetery. It's a 10 minute drive from my house. How can I leave the spot where Joe is buried?
- My pediatrician. Would you believe that he hasn't charged me a single co-pay since Joe died? That's a lot of co-pays. He seems to genuinely care for my kids. I'd hate to give him up.
- My commute. It's short, and at times, relaxing.
- It's familiar. I've lived here my whole life. It;s what I know. And like RAD said in the above post's comments, "I've had enough change." (Well, she said something like that. I'm too lazy to look right now.)
14 comments:
You're very blessed. You have a lot to be thankful for.
I like this list better. :o)
Ohhhh, this all sounds so good too.
Tough decision. Definately not one to rush.
I would imagine it would be VERY difficult to leave the house you lived in together. It makes me think of the car, if the car was tough, wouldn't the house be harder?
Oh, B. We'll all be here, reading all about this.
The one thing that wouldn't change: your blogger freinds. We would all find you in the same place in cyberspace!! :)
Very interesting lists.
I'm not going to be so presumptuous as to offer up an opinion on what you should do. Only you can figure that out, and only in time.
But, for me, making some pretty major changes during the 18-30 month timeframe was necessary to grow into the new "me" as a young widowed mom. Maybe you'll move...maybe you won't. But I just wanted to say that I understand a bit what you're going through.
If we didn't live several hundred miles apart, I'd say we have the same pediatrician. Not a single co-pay since Nick died ... AND free flu shots.
What a wonderful doctor.
Good luck making your decision.
I post this not intending it to sway you one way or the other - only you will know the best thing for you and your boys - but, IF you do move, my experience has been that it takes 3 years to build the same network around me as the one I left. I don't know why it's 3 years, it just has been for me. Once I worked this out, I found I was less stressed in my new location because I knew that time was needed. Networks take time.
Ali
Ali-
I agree, I think it does take time, years to get comfortable somewhere, I am working on my 3rd year here, and it's finally falling into place.
(still working on that close best buddy though;)
Nice list, b. :-) I can understand these thoughts. I'm wondering the same things about my situation.
And yes, the time it takes to build a network...I've been here 7 years and around year 4 I started to feel like it was home, then spent 2 enjoying it and taking advantage of it, and now in year 7 I'm wondering if I need or want to go through all that change again somewhere else.
The answer is getting clearer to me, but it only started happening when I made the conscientious decision to just 'be' and to let life and that inner voice guide me.
Good luck with the decison. Your cyberfriends will always be here! :-)
Cheers!
Random thoughts after reading your post:
-from the photos you have posted your backyard does look awesome.
-my transplanted Yankees fans (daughters) face some challenges living here in MA, but it does build character.
-my husband is buried 2 hrs away in our CT hometown, but I'm NOT moving back there.
-change is hard, but you are clearly looking at it from all angles and ultimately must do what is right for YOU and your boys.
I only have selfish comments to make & that isn't fair...
Actually it is nice that either option has so many positives.
BTWm I wasn't quite as polite as you quote--"I am fed up with change"
All are very good reasons. Can't wait to see the other side of the coin :)
Well, I'm certainly biased toward MA, since it's the only place I've ever been truly pleased to live. But that's me. And I'm weird.
But I see the appeal of NY. And I'm comforted (as I suspected I would be) that J&J will be indoctrinated as Joe would have wanted, no matter where you all live.
Speaking of the three-year network cycle, mine's just coming to fruition, and it's true. One sure sign is that when I got here, I swear I didn't care a whit for baseball. Now look at me!
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