Going On A Bear Hunt
Are you familiar with this book? It's a classic children's tale, and was given to Jacob when he was born. Even as a baby he loved listening to it, because it has a repeating rhythm that is soothing.
So what's my point? Why am I sharing this?
Because I realized that this book is a good analogy to grief.
The story goes something like this:
We're going on a bear hunt
we're gonna catch a big one
we're not scared
what a beautiful day
Oh NO a river!
Can't go over it
Can't go under it
Have to go through it
This pattern continues with various obstacles until they find the bear. Each obstacle they come to seems impossible to deal with, as they realize that the only way to get to the other side is to go through it. But they do get through it. Each and every time they make it through.
I am surrounded by obstacles right now. They appear to be so large in fact that I am finding myself to be paralyzed with fear. I can't concentrate. I can't make conversation. I can't parent well. I am consumed with the obstacle of grief.
But I can't go over it.
I can't go under it.
I have to go through it.
And I will make it to the other side.
I'm not sure when, but I will.
Thanks for sticking with me as I try to get there.
-b
So what's my point? Why am I sharing this?
Because I realized that this book is a good analogy to grief.
The story goes something like this:
We're going on a bear hunt
we're gonna catch a big one
we're not scared
what a beautiful day
Oh NO a river!
Can't go over it
Can't go under it
Have to go through it
This pattern continues with various obstacles until they find the bear. Each obstacle they come to seems impossible to deal with, as they realize that the only way to get to the other side is to go through it. But they do get through it. Each and every time they make it through.
I am surrounded by obstacles right now. They appear to be so large in fact that I am finding myself to be paralyzed with fear. I can't concentrate. I can't make conversation. I can't parent well. I am consumed with the obstacle of grief.
But I can't go over it.
I can't go under it.
I have to go through it.
And I will make it to the other side.
I'm not sure when, but I will.
Thanks for sticking with me as I try to get there.
-b
7 comments:
Great analogy. As the kids in the book get "through" it, you will too. I wish I knew when too, but you will. Hang in there. We will always stick with you. :o)
P.S. You do parent well - very well.
A's favorite singer, Steve Roslonik, sings a version of Going on a Bear Hunt. I actually had that line playing in my head earlier today when I spoke to you and said...you just have to go through.
Interesting.
Hi b,
Hang in there. Did you enjoy your girl's weekend?
((B))
You are right. You have to go through it and we can't help you, you have to do it yourself.
But you do have a great support network, and use it if you know what you need.
:)
What an excellent interpretation/application of the story. Truly. That's rather awesome.
I've used the same story as an analogy for my grief story.
I'm hoping that all the going 'through' experiences will give me the courage when I find that damn bear, to look him in the eye and say "I am not going back. We're going to have to work out how to get along peacably now I've made it here."
There's a heap of going 'through' still ahead of me first. I just like to have my bravado planned!
Ali
We can learn a lot from kids books. In fact I think we can learn a lot from kids in general.
They never seem to let things get to them. Something bad happens, they cry, they move on, they forget about what made them cry.
How often do you see depressed kids? It's not often and if they are it's generally caused by some repeated wrong that leads them to dwell on the bad.
It's only in their teens and adulthood that depression really seems to take a foothold and I blame society for that.
If only society acted more likes kids then there wouldn't be so much of a problem.
I actually wrote along these very lines in one of my posts:
Children Should Rule The World
The White Stripes have a song called "Little Acorns" which has the line 'Be Like The Squirrel Girl, Be Like The Squirrel'. I say be like the kids girl be like the kids. :-)
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