Random Thoughts of Unfairness

1. M from group has MS
This I just don't understand. Too cruel, too unfair, too ridiculous.

2. Someone looked at a picture of Josh today and asked me if he had Joe's eyes, and I couldn't answer the question because I can't remember what Joe's eyes look like. I realize I can look at a picture, but am trying to picture them from memory, and I can't. I also can't remember his voice. I know it was deep, but I can't hear it in my head.

3. This will be my second Thanksgiving without Joe. I remember our last Thanksgiving together we played a murder mystery game. Jacob was 5 months old, and I was pregnant with Josh, but we hadn't told anyone yet. Joe was really funny that night. He was a funny guy.

4. I miss him.

5. Joshua will never have a single picture with his father.

6. Jacob will never fully understand how similar he is to his father.

7. I can't afford preschool for both boys without asking for help.

8. I have a whole group of friends who are in a very similar situation to mine. We are all good people, and none of us deserve this.

9. I will always wonder what my life would have been like if Joe were still here.

-B